A Very Prezzi View
by Tib Dunncan
Summary: Dib is the outcast of the school. But with a cast of characters like these, he might just wish he DIDN'T have any friends! Introducing Prezzi, Olivia, Mystic and the Shadows, Brent, The Twins and April! -OC Story-
1. Master of All Technology

The students sat in class as the informational video played. The boy screamed and screamed and hopped and screamed from bladder strain. All but two of the students were in a disturbed, hypnotic silence. Dib, who remained uncaring, and Zim, who sat sniggering at the stupid hyumin wormbaby's stupid foolishness.

There was a dry buzz from the front of the room as the digital projector shorted. When the screaming abruptly stopped, Dib looked up. Half of the children in the classroom were nearing emotional exhaustion. A few passed out. The young paranormal investigator sighed, happy that the assault on his ears had ceased, yet annoyed at the fact that the projector had broken. He stood up. "I'll fix it," he muttered. With his father being who he was, it was hard for Dib to not have a knack with machinery.

He stepped forward to be greeted by another dry buzz, louder this time, as the player burst into flames.

He frowned deeply as the sprinkler system flooded the classroom to whining cries of, "Dib broke it!"

* * *

><p>Do not be alarmed! I promise, the page is fully loaded! The peculiar thing about this story - besides its characters, of course - is that is DOES have a plot, sort of, but it's not broken into chapters. It's broken into MOMENTS. Which means that almost every chapter is painfully short. After a while, it WILL all come together, but bear with me until we can get into the swing of things, eh? BECAUSE these moments pass very quickly, I will post two moments every time I upload (after this upload, of course). Which should be every week or so.<p>

Also, I want you guys to keep an eye out for all the allusions included in the story. There's one in this chapter, to start you off, but I won't be as generous in the future if you're playing this game with me. You have to find them on your own.

I don't even know if anyone reads these things...

-Tibby D


	2. New Kid Conundrum

Well, he felt sorry for her. There was a new girl sitting in Marna's old seat. Yes, the projector had burst into flames before his very eyes a week earlier, but the janitorial squad at the skool had miraculously fixed it. (Dib had no intention of ever offering to 'fix' it again.) This meant that they were going to have to finish that video

She sat quietly in the back of the room, smiling and doodling in her notebook. Dib glanced back at her as the video resumed where they had left off. She looked up from her notebook, wide eyed and terrified at the kid on the screen who was screaming with bladder exertion.

At this point, even Dib couldn't take his eyes off the horror before him.

The screaming got louder and louder, they boy's face looking more and more strained with every passing, pee-denying second.

There was a loud bang as the boy exploded, chunks of human flesh flying everywhere across the screen.

The movie ended; the class was quiet, though he was sure a few were silently vomiting. Then, softly, he heard a chuckle. At first Dib was mad – how could Zim laugh at that, no matter how much he hated the human race? That was just terrible!

But he realized, the laugh wasn't Zim's. It was less obnoxious and, indeed, more feminine. Dib turned around in his seat to see the new kid doubled over in her almost silent laughter.

He turned back to face the front of the room, slightly disturbed, but not before noticing that Zim had also turned to look at her.


	3. Prezzi Dent

And it would be all too easy, Zim thought as he approached the new kid. This 'Prezzi' girl had been unfortunate enough to have been chosen for Zim's next hyumin experiment. He walked up calmly to her, smiling. "Hello, female wormbaby. You have been chosen to take part in a neurological experiment conducted and operated entirely by the United States govern-ment. We start now." He grabbed her arm, intending to lead her back to his base.

Zim's composure left him for a moment as he saw the Dib-Monkey out of the corner of his superior Irken eyeball, coming straight for him. The alien knew he had to move a bit faster, as he dragged the hyumin female away.

Dib was pushing through the dense crowd of people as fast as he could to get to Prezzi and Zim, but what he saw next made him stop dead in his tracks: The girl's eyes went wide as Zim started to drag her away. He body went completely limp, falling to the ground and taking Zim with her. She stood, grabbed Zim by the collar of his shirt-thing, and threw him against the brick wall of the skool building. She then ran like a serial murderer was chasing her, all the way out of the skool yard, and down the block until she vanished.

Dib stared for a moment, watching the alien's broken form twitch before turning and walking away.

Strange…


	4. The Paranormal Investigator

"Hi," he felt awkward and foolish just walking up for her desk like that, but he wanted to make sure she was alright.

She looked up at him, suspicious. "I know _you_. You're that Membrane Kid."

Dib shuffled his feet underneath him. Apparently, Prezzi had heard of his reputation. He grinned in embarrassment. "Yeah."

"They say you're crazy." She responded, coolly. Dib began to feel uncomfortable. Not even in town two days and she thought he was insane. A sigh had barely escaped his lips when she spoke next. "But I can see past your little façade." She sat forward, her eyes narrowed and a nasty grin plastered across her face. "I know you're actually a super intelligent by-product of one of Professor Membrane's experiments!"

The young paranormal investigator was taken aback by her accusations, stuttering around his words. "I, uhm, well, I guess… thanks? I mean, I'm not a byproduct of _any_ experiments, I don't think…"

Prezzi frowned. "Why would the Professor conspire against one of his own conspiracies?" she muttered, puzzled.

One of?

Despite the now awkward atmosphere between the two, Dib continued. "I just wanted to, uhm… make sure that you were okay after yesterday. You know… you beat Zim?"

"Who?" She asked, looking up at him.

"Zim. He attacked you yesterday?"

Her frown deepened.

"How can you not remember?" he shouted. "You threw him into a wall!" To his relief, Zim marched into the classroom at that precise moment. "Him!" Dib pointed at the alien.

A sudden look of realization came over her face. "Oh, the green fellow! Yeah. He said he was with the government, so, naturally, I had to defend myself."

"From the government?"

She nodded. "You see, my uncle and I have this theory about how all government officials are really demon lizard men who feed off of gasoline. That's why it's so expensive, so that you'll buy less and they can eat more. But they don't want anyone to know, so I'm in constant danger." She said.

"That's dumb!"

Prezzi's eyes narrowed "It is not! You know, he was right about you." She said, almost nonchalantly. "You _are_ a skeptic."

"A…a skeptic?"

"Always aiming to disprove the legitimate theories of a great paranormal investigator!" she stood and walked off to lunch.

Dib thought, _What?_


	5. Voo Dib

Prezzi stood at the front of the room, a small red doll held proudly in her hands for show and tell. "This is my cursed voodoo doll that my uncle sent me for my birthday. He said it wasn't _of_ anybody, but when I tried to attune it to my mother, it didn't work. I guess it's broke." She said, sadly. "But what you do is, you take any sharp object, like a needle," she held up a small sewing needle that glistened under the fluorescent skool lights. The children stared apprehensively.

Dib was secretly annoyed. Last time he'd tried to do a presentation on voodoo, the kids had talked through it. But they were completely absorbed in Prezzi's show.

"…And all you do, is take it and jab it into the doll like this." She brought the needle down on the doll, penetrating the thin cloth and rushing into it.

Dib jerked out of his seat, shouting in pain, clutching his arm. It felt as though someone had driven a pocket knife though his upper arm. "Prezzi!" he growled, through clenched teeth.

"Oh!" she cried, quickly pulling the pin out from the doll's arm.

The pain subsided almost immediately. He sighed in relief, picking himself up from the floor, and looked at Prezzi, who had a wide smile on her face. His stomach dropped.

"Hey Dib?"

Oh, jeeze.

Prezzi moved the doll's arm across its face repeatedly; Dib copied its action. "Why're you hitting yourself? Huh, Dib? Why're you hitting yourself? Huh? Huh? Huh, Dib? Huh?"

The class roared with laughter. She wasn't hitting him hard, and he was grateful for that, but the heat still rose to his cheeks in embarrassment. Finally, his hand fell to his side as Prezzi walked up to him. "I like my voodoo doll, but I'm guessing you'd want to hold onto this one." She handed him to voodoo doll and smiled before her eyes went wide and she leaned in close to him. "But if you're going to try to get rid of it, don't burn it. I heard a story about a guy who knew a guy who had a voodoo doll that he wanted to get rid of, so he burned it, and he caught on fire and burnt all his hair off." She whispered ominously.

Dib took the doll and looked at her. This girl was crazy, for sure.


	6. Enter Olivia

Dib climbed the steps to the second floor, throwing open his bedroom door where he was greeted with a shrill "Hello!" and a giggle.

Dib merely stared, too tired to put up with this. "Who are you?

She jumped off the bed. "Madame Olivia!" she said proudly. The girl hardly stood half Dib's height.

He picked her up by the back of her shirt and dropped her out the second story window, where the security drones promptly caught her as she fell, escorting her off of Membrane property.

Dib looked at her once out his window before shutting and locking it and going to bed.


	7. Natural Defense

"Goodnight, Gaz."

"Go to bed." His younger sister scowled, slamming her bedroom door closed.

Dib stood at the entrance of his own room and sighed, opening the door.

He nearly staggered back as he gagged. When he had opened his door, the air that had wafted from the room was more pungent than the time that Gaz had hid four dead hamsters under his bed when he was six.

Holding one hand over his airways, he flicked on the light switch.

Several jars of cloudy yellow-orange water were stationed on his desk and night table. Small red spheres hung from every elevated surface in his room save for the window, from which Prezzi was readying to hang the last string of spheres.

"Hello, Dib."

"Prezzi? How—What are you doing?"

"Hanging radishes." She answered promptly, hooking the last string in place. "They're miniatures fermented in garlic. For protection."

Dib was bewildered. "Protection? Against what?"

Prezzi's voice dropped to a whisper. "The demon janitor from skool. The one with the lazy eye? He's out to get you, you know." Her features took on a look of such concern that Dib found it difficult to be upset at the moment. Absently, he noticed a string of the radishes hung around her neck.

Dib examined one of the jars, his free hand blocking against the menacing smell. "Alright. Is all this really necessary?"

"Every last bit of it. Here," she handed him a small jar of seeds. "If the defenses don't work, throw these on the floor – he'll have to pick them all up – and then you come to my place while he does that." Prezzi smiled and left, closing the bedroom door behind her, trapping Dib in the enclosed space with the radishes.


End file.
